Week 2 result and Push it!!

Hey Guys

Well week two weigh in bought me good result of a 2lb loss and bringing my total to 7lb so I made my half a stone point already! whoop whoop! what a brilliant feeling and I'm proving to myself again that I can make this happen!

I only cycled 3 days last week but I'm going to aim for the full 5 this week as I've set myself a target of a 2-3lb loss on Saturday so fingers crossed I can do it again. I know I can.

Thinking last week about why I'm fat (yes I used the "F" word, it doesn't bother me) has also got me thinking over the weekend about why I'm now losing weight and what I have to gain from losing. Here's a few reasons I've come up with so far-

• My health- Obvious priority number 1, without it I'd be in serious trouble. I've never really suffered from any obesity related illness, such as high blood pressure or diabetes, but I have an injured knee that starts screaming at me as I get bigger. It screams at me now when I cycle but I know that's because I'm doing it good and strengthening it. Either way I know that my size is no good for my health and its just better for me to be slimmer, at only 5 foot 1 tall my weight is definitely not healthy.
• Steve- Now my beloved husband has never made my weight an issue. I was 3st smaller than I am now when I first met me and he loves me just as much at this size as he did then (atleast I hope so lol) but I feel like I'm not the wife he deserves at the moment. He shouldn't have to defend me when people stare or snigger in the street as we are a bit of an odd looking pair. He's 6ft 2 and muscular where I'm completely the opposite. I want to be able to walk beside him with my head held high and knowing that people are looking for all the right reasons. He's forever telling me how proud he is of me making these changes, no matter how many times I've tried and failed, and I feel like I owe it to him to lose the weight as a thank you for all of his unconditional and never-ending support and love. He's a man in a million and whatever fitness related crazy I want he goes out of his way to make sure I have it, Insanity- got it, Zumba boxset- have it and as one of my anniversary presents next month he's buying me a FitBit so that I can keep track of all the exercise I'm doing. He's my biggest fan and my truest critic. If he sees me slipping up he'll call me on it and if anything it makes me love him more. I will make him proud.
• A baby- Now before any of my family read this and get any ideas, no we're not trying for a baby yet! But as we've now been married a year obviously babies do pop up in conversation from time to time and we've made no secret of the fact that we will be having children at some point in the not too distant future. what does play on my mind though is the fact that I want to be rid of most of this weight before we do get preggers as I want to have a healthy pregnancy and to be an active, healthy mummy for my child. As previously mentioned I already have an injured knee and whacking my current weight and then baby weight on it really wouldn't be a good idea plus I'm always seeing programmes on TV about larger people having babies and how dangerous it can be and really don't want that for me or my unborn baby. Also Steve has expressed concern over me having baby at this size saying he doesn't want my size to cause complications and, worst case scenario, to leave him holding a baby without me around, yes it may sound far fetched but being as overweight as I am what's not to say that that couldn't be a possibility? Having a baby is a massive strain on a womans body and it brings along things I have never experienced  and some things I don't even know about so to give my child the best start in life I want to be as healthy as possible.

Well that's enough of my rambling for one night but a little insight into what's whizzing round in my head at the moment and some of the reason why I'm really pushing it every step of the way.

Until tomorrow xxxx

First weigh in (again) and some inner exploring

Hey Guys

Well I was hoping for a good result after last weeks efforts and I got it.....5lb lost!!!
I'm so pleased and its given me a real boost to keep going and has kept me strong this week, I'm hoping to at least hit my first half a stone loss this week so fingers crossed. I've kept within my calories allowance and I'm still cycling to and from work and doing a workout when I come home and I can feel a small difference already which is so exciting!

I've decided not to blog everyday as some days are pretty much the same as the last and I don't want this blog to be a glorified food diary as that just gets boring to read and just as boring to write! So I'll blog when there's something interesting going on or something I want to rant about lol

Those of you that know me personally know that I love weightloss TV programmes such as The Biggest Loser, well my current addiction is watching episodes of Extreme Weightloss on YouTube and its definitely a motivational boost. One of the things I do love about it is that they look at getting rid of the weight but solving the issues as to why that person is obese and its never just because they like the taste of food and its got me thinking about why I'm overweight.
To be honest I'm not 100% sure but part of the reason, I think, is that food is always associated with happy times in my childhood, birthday parties, weekends with my dad and him treating us, baking with my mum etc and part of me thinks that maybe this has made me associate food with being happy and happy times and is programmed into my brain that when I want to feel happy I eat.
Well now its time to replace those thoughts with new, healthier habits, for example I love the buzz I get after exercising and then the thrill of getting on the scales and seeing the numbers going down and no food can really give me the same feeling so why bother with it??

I know that the issues with food I have wont be solved overnight and its going to take a long time for me to think about food normally, or maybe I never will, maybe it will just be a sense of controlling those issues, whatever it may be, I will overcome this and become the woman I long to be

until later xxxx

No Pain, No Pain!

Hey Guys!

Another great day today and still on track and going strong!
Started the day with Bran flakes and milk, I had an apple at 10.30, lunch was a chicken salad and then dinner was a carrot an onion omelette with some leftover chicken! yummy! I did allow myself 3 Jaffa Cakes and a few chocolate bonbon sweets today as a treat, my sister had a big operation today and, as an emotional eater, all I wanted was a comfort food while I was worrying and waiting to hear if she was ok but I didn't go mad and dive into the biscuit tin at work or anything and the treats I did have left me with calories to spare for the day so I'm happy with that. I still cycled my 7 mile journey and then did a 10 minute Boxercise YouTube workout video that was brilliant!

I woke up this morning aching all over from all the working out I've been doing but my mind (being in a positive kinda mood) told me to get my arse out of bed and onto the bike! Admittedly things did not get easier on the way to work, my legs were aching every pedal of the way but I powered through and got there! As I cycle along cycle paths and pavements I allow myself to listen to music on my trip and todays choice was the song "Hearts on Fire" from the film Rocky 4 which is fab for a bit of motivation. I've watched the film a million times and love how, when Rocky's training, they say "No pain, No pain" well this became my little mantra on that ride!
Also when I got home I really didn't want to do the boxing workout but my mind took me into a little daydream of my sisters wedding and me walking round in my gorgeous dress that I've chosen and some beautiful high heels and I was off of the sofa!

I will keep this momentum going and deep down I know that despite how hard it is now, things will get easier and it will all be worth it in the end

so NO PAIN! NO PAIN! LOL

Until tomorrow xxxx

Fall seven times, stand up eight!

Hey guys!

Well today has been another great day, I did the 7 mile bike ride to and from work and then when I got home I did some stomach crunches and side crunches to help tone up my flub as I go along. I'm feeling so positive at the moment and I really just hope this feeling lasts!

As positive as I'm feeling at the moment I keep having these little thoughts in the back of my mind saying "We've been here before, you'll fail again" and "yeah yeah yeah we've heard all this before and you're still fat aren't you?"
I know I shouldn't listen but part of me really does think about I have had all these positive feelings before and here I am still back at square one. I'm not going to let these thoughts stop me though and will keep pushing through it all to get to where I want to be. Failure is not an option this time!!

I will make this happen to become the woman I want to be, to give Steve the wife he deserves and to one day be a positive role model for my children. It'll take time to prove to everyone, myself included, what I'm capable of and I'm prepared to do whatever it takes.

So I will keep pushing on and sharing my journey with anyone that wants to read my ramblings!!

Until tomorrow guys xxx

Stop and stare

Hey Guys!

Well today has been a really good day and im feeling great!
I did the cycle to and from work as usual and then when I got in I did a 10 minute Tiffany Rothe Workout on Youtube called the Booty Shaking Waist Workout, I definitely felt like a fool doing it but its an amazing workout!

Today I got slightly annoyed by the amount of people openly gawking at me as I bimble along on my bike. I get that Its not particularly common to see a big person on a bike but anyone would think that I was cycling along with 3 heads! I know people will look as I probably do look funny but I just wish people just glanced rather than out and out staring, It really does make me feel so self conscious. I put this on my personal Facebook page and got some wonderful comments back about how I am doing something about my weight and to keep my chin up and focus on what im doing which is exactly what I'm going to do. Im not sat around waiting for a miracle to get me slim, Im out there doing something about it so I refuse to feel bad for letting the world see me try.

Well that's my rant over with so back to todays food. For breakfast was Branflakes and milk, lunch was a egg salad with croutons and salad cream and dinner was my healthy spaghetti Bolognese (with extra onion, grated carrot and kidney beans) with mixed veg and im absolutely STUFFED!! Its a great feeling to be full of good healthy food again and its really given me a boost.

So heres hoping for another good day tomorrow!

Until then guys xxx

Something to aim for...

Hey guys!

Well the exercise part of my new "baby steps" approach is going well. I'm still cycling the 8 mile journey too and from work and I can see it changing my body already....now I just need to sort my eating out. I am eating healthier but it still needs improving.

So as of tomorrow I'm going back to basics and back to simple healthy eating and using some of my old Slimming World recipes. I'll be having something like bran flakes for breakfast, salad for lunch and then having something simple like fish and veg for dinner. If I want any snacks I will be having fruit and nothing else. I'm just going back to basics to give myself the best chance of maximising my weight loss and getting the best results!

My sister Leanne got engaged last week and is planning to get married next year. I have an idea in mind of the outfit I would like to wear (its a dress) and how I would like to look in it and to achieve that I'm going to have to go hard for the next 12 months (and beyond that but 12 months for this particular occasion) but I know its something I am capable of doing if I put my mind to it. Its also a good motivation as its something to aim for.

So my tyres are pumped, tomorrows salad is made and I'm ready for the week ahead!! Bring it on!!

Until tomorrow guys! xxx